A 150 Per Cent Increase in Nectarine Production!

Reports from the Orchard Division at Great Plotnik World Headquarters indicate a 150% increase in nectarine production over 2008. (The 2009 calculation is based on the one nectarine we got in 2008, one half of which wasn't rotten.) In mathematical terms the trend is straight up!

You nattering nabobs of negativity may note there are only two nectarines, but these two will be TASTY!, we hope, if the birds don't get them first.

Meanwhile, the transformation of the 3-Fruit Citrus Tree, purchased around 1995 from Costco, into a Meyer Lemon Only Tree is complete. The little semi-dwarf beauty was transplanted five years ago into its current spot, and then over time has had its Washington Navel and Tangelo spurs methodically removed, when Plotnik could figure out which spur was an orange or a tangelo and not a lemon. The tree is now thriving as a Meyer Lemon Only tree. It seems to have taken those five years for its sturdy roots to hit paydirt down underground somewhere and now it is growing and stretching and acting like a fine citizen of the garden.



(The reason for the surgery is simple: Plotnik had just come from subtropical Stiletto City when he confidently purchased that tree. He did not yet understand the summertime cloud. But three-fruit citrus trees come on very strong rootstocks, even though navel oranges and tangelos don't survive in Saint Plotniko backyards. Pruned correctly, the tree now produces the Meyer lemons we love, but on an even stronger rootstock than a normal Meyer Lemon tree. Sharp thinkin,' eh?)

And cherry tomato season is upon us. These yummers will continue for several months, red ones and gold ones. The Sungolds are sweeter, but the Red Cherries have more tomato flavor, plus they re-seed themselves for next year.



Artichoke production remained the same in 2009 as in previous years, with the Harvest Per Fruit ratio being fixed at 0:All. This means whatever happens on the plant stays on the plant, since it apparently takes serious non-organic measures to keep the jillions of pincher bugs from swarming all over the artichokes, and then into your kitchen if you try to harvest them. So the Plotniks never eat their artichokes (the long-lived perennial plants were in the garden when they bought their house), but keep them for their gorgeous blue puffball flowers.



Meanwhile, two more major transformations have occurred back East. The Plotniks East have completed their move from Stroller Gulch to (Not That) Clinton Hill. We anxiously await photographs. Isabella reports their new apartment has TWO POTTIES!

AND -- take note, ladies -- a certain Plotnik appears to have cut her hair. We have seen one photo and the girl that was gorgeous with pounds of dreadlocks is still gorgeous without them. You shall see when all permissions are granted.