Mmmm Shishlik

After riding the Plotkicycle up and down Saint Plotniko's chilly hills this morning, because his wussy basketball players couldn't PLAY because it was so COLD and the court was WET and WAH WAH WAH, The Great Plotnik's thoughts turn naturally to food.

Mmmmm, lamb chops at Shamshiri Restaurant in West Wooden, a neighborhood of Stiletto City near the University (UCSTC). Persians have filled this neighborhood with their scrumptiferous restaurants, and Shamshiri is one of the best. Sunday is Persian Night Out, and it's hard to find a place to park, a place to sit inside, a waitress to take your order. Making a decision from the menu is work too. The kebab grill in the back has five men trying to keep up with the demand, while the smell of saffron and garlic and spices makes each diner drool in anticipation.

Plotnik sits with Ducknik, his nephew Nefnik, Nefnik's girl Fefnik, and Fefnik's 7-year-old gambler son, Vashnik. Do not EVER bet against Vashnik, you will lose.

Two summers ago, Vashnik, then five, sat on Plotnik's shoulders at the paddock at Del Mar Race Track, before Race 5. He pointed at a brown horse and said "Him!" Plotnik put five bucks on the brown horse's nose, who won by five lengths. Plot split his winnings with Vashnik (in retrospect, probably not the wisest thing to do).

Back to Shamshiri. Plotnik settles on the Shishlik -- SIX, count 'em, SIX barbecued lamb chops, served with a lemony cucumber, herb and tomato salad called Shiraz, grilled tomatoes, peppers and onions and a pile of buttery rice. Being smart, he substitutes for the white rice with Shirin Polo, a fantastic rice dish with orange peel, pistachios, almonds and saffron.

Nefnik says he's not hungry. Instead, he sits on Plotnik's right and whines incessantly for more lamb, WAH WAH WAH.

Plotnik suggests you probably think twice about ordering any of the Persian stews much favored by Fefnik, who grew up eating these things. Every culture has a few beloved soul food dishes that all other cultures find basically inedible. Think chitterlings and chopped liver. And now Sabzi Goopzo, which is Persian Green Slime in Lemon Sauce which has been left outside to rot.

But, MMMMMMM, Shishlik! Someday, Plotnik and Ducknik will learn to order one order of Shishlik and split it, but they haven't learned yet.