Don't Run Out of Chocolates Next Time

Last night Plotnik and Ducknik went to the opening of Tom Stoppard's 'Travesties' at A.C.T. Theater. It used to be called The Geary Theatre, until last night, when A.C.T., in honor of its 40th Anniversary, cut a pink ribbon on stage and renamed the theater the American Conservatory Theater. Gavin Newsom proclaimed Sept 20. 2006 as American Conservatory Theater Day in Saint Plotniko. Tom Ammiano was in the front row and he applauded with everyone else. Thank God he didn't speak.

The play, written in the 1970s, was LONG. Brilliant too, but Stoppard tends to leave the Great Plotnik yawning, because nothing much happens. At the intermission, at which champagne was proffered, and chocolates too, supposedly, but all the chocolates were consumed by the first people out into the lobby so Plot and Duck never found any, Plot said to Duck "if you want to leave now, we can" ... and Duck ran into the theater, got her coat and they were out of there before the Korbel lost one more bubble.

Usually it is Plot who tires more in longwinded yakfests, but he was actually enjoying himself. He might have stayed. But Duck had had a long day and was tired. Chocolate might have helped. Coffee. Joe, make it a double.

'Travesties' is an investment -- you need to treat it that way. Take a long nap first and eat some fish. Your brain and your ears need to be tuned in. It's like dialing Traffic Safety at 1750 on the AM dial. One tree in the way and you won't get any reception.

Look, this is a blog, for God's sake! It's sub-jec-tive, as our Pre-si-dent would say, taking a long time between syl-la-bles.

Some people love Stephen Sondheim and some people love Phillip Glass. The same people love Tom Stoppard. The Great Plotnik enjoys selected work from all of these fine writers, but he prefers it when he doesn't leave the theater saying "My, that was vintage Stoppard!" Instead, he loves to say: "My! What a great show!"

And no chocolates. The Great Plotnik Theater Awards Division awards 'Travesties' a star for the outrageous premise, another star and a half for great acting (SOOOO many words), and an extra half a star for a huge crowd that allowed the Plotniks to duck out the front door before Act 2 began. Take off half a star for running out of truffles -- I mean, come ON! Announce chocolates? Have chocolates. Don't get our hopes up. Jeez.

So that comes to 2 1/2 Stars for Travesties. And the Plotzers lost again.