Sex With Rabbits

Good, the election is over and somebody probably won. Now they can stop the robocalls and birdcage liner sheets in the mail.

Does anyone listen to robocalls? Do any readers of The Great Plotnik get past the silence when you pick up the phone, or the ".....HI! I'm Kamala Harris!" before you hang up?

Plotnik read that bulk mailers know you'll only glance at their candidate's slick propaganda sheet for an average of three seconds before you toss it in the garbage. So they just want to grab you with a bright color image of the candidate. It's like hearing somebody at a party say someone else's name. It goes in. You ignore it, but it's already in there.

Which of course means that you could produce a mailer with your name on it in bright letters, and then below it a photo of your opponent having sex with a rabbit. In the brief three seconds between table and trash can, your name would register as well as the photo's message.

"Hmm. I LIKE this T.G. Plotnik guy. And, you know, I heard somewhere that all his opponents have sex with rabbits."