You Gonna Eat That Biggu Makku?

Biggu Makku
Originally uploaded by thegreatplotnik.

The Great Plotnik has to fatten up. The reason is clear:

To learn Kanji for his Kanji Class, The Great Plotnik needs to utilize his Purotniku-san no Atama ni Kanji no Kyooshitsu, which is to say the Kanji Learning Center in Plotnik's Brain. Now, although his Meaningless Drivel Learning Center and his Lyrics from Ancient Obscure Hits Learning Center are both far larger than they have any right to be, The Kanji Learning Center in Plotnik's Brain appears to be the size of a soy bean.

Only a finite number of Kanji can squeeze in there at any one time.

For Plotnik to learn the Kanji for a quiz on Lessons 10 and 11, as he did yesterday afternoon, random Kanji from, say, Lessons 2 and 5 and 8 have to vacate the premises.

Oh, Plotnik was geared up and ready for 'machi-ai-shitsu' (waiting room) and 'mainichi' (every day), and he was even ready for 'oyogi,' 'sui-ei' and 'kai sui.'

These three demon words (swim, swimming and sea water) are made up of the kanji for water, the radical for water (a radical is a piece of a kanji), and the kanji for swimming. The kanji for swimming is made up of the kanji for water and the radical for water, which means water-water. The kanji for sea water is made up of the kanji for water, followed by the radical for water and the kanji for water, which means water water-water. The kanji for swimming is made up of the radical for water, kanji for water and kanji for water, becoming water-water water. Plotnik had water-water, water water-water, and water-water water DOWN.

Sadly, to learn these three meant that 'new,' 'rest' and 'rice field' had to flee the Kanji Learning Center in Plotnik's Brain and head down to the student union for sushi and a beer.

The obvious problem, not enough space, suggests an even more obvious remedy:
The Great Plotnik has to fatten up. Eat more. Gorge. Stretch his molecules. As he gets bigger, his Kanji Learning Center is also bound to enlarge. Where his computer uses giagabytes of RAM, Plotnik will employ mega-bites of HAM.

There seems to be no alternative. Plotnik has only learned 127 kanji so far, and none of these have promised to remain in his head while he tackles the next 127. Eventually he must learn, hold on to your Dagwood Bumstead Triple Decker, 2,000 kanji before he can even read a Japanese newspaper. To learn 2,000, at his current size, he will need to study 10,000. It has taken him four months to gloss over 127. Don't bother doing the math, Plotnik has done it for you.

The Great Plotnik will be 96 years old before he can read the Asahi Shinbun.

(You may be interested to know that 'Asahi Shinbun' is made up of the Kanjis for Morning, Day, New and Hear.
Morning contains the radical for 'month.' New contains the radical for 'arrow.' Hear contains the radical for 'gate.' NOW do you see?

So, friend, you gonna eat that Biggu Makku?