String of Pearls

Today is The Great Ducknik's birthday. Two of her favorite three presents in the world are still asleep in Dan's room. The third called this morning from a camping trip in Vermont. The Duck even decided not to go to her workout, saying "it's my birthday. If I don't want to go down there I don't have to." First, however, she secured a promise** from Plotnik that he wouldn't play basketball either, although he DID ride his plotkicycle down to the court, just to say, you know, hi. We can talk about that ** some other time.

Now, about this string of pearls. These are probably the finest in the land, and The Great Plotnik acquired them for The Great Ducknik's birthday after scouring bazaars and souks and provincial markets and fine haute jeuleries around the world. Finally, he uncovered a rare box in the Cookware store on Castro Street.

OK, so they're not pearls. This is a Pie Weight Chain. You put it on top of the crust when you bake it in advance of putting in the filling, as in sour cream lemon pie, as in lemon mirengue pie. Duck has been wanting one.

The lady at the Cookware store said "I usually just put a pound o' beans on my crust. That works as well as these, but if you wanta buy 'em..."

"I want to buy them," said Plotnik. "I can't give my wife a pound of **!*% beans for her birthday."

"Oh, no, ho ho," said the lady, and her assistant also said "Ho ho, no." She knew right where to look for the pie weight chain, which was only covered with perhaps two inches of dust.

That's not all Ducknik got from Plot, but it was a good start, after the phone call at 7AM from Vermont, and the calls from Atlanta, L.A. and L.A. again. All this, and PunkyDunky and Five Point Seven Head are still asleep and they've got something up their sleeves for sure.