All You Can Eat and Baseball Superstition

Plotnik keeps wondering what exactly happens at this All You Can Eat Fantasy at Plotzer Stadium. WHAT All You Can Eat? It's sponsored by AM/PM for God's sake! From which delicacies do you get to choose? Red licorice twirls, nachos from Tuesday, slushees? Those rank AM/PM hot dogs that have been baking on those steel rollers in a Martian infrared glaze? How many hot dogs or slushees can anyone eat at any one ballgame? And what about extra innings? If any cousins or anyone else have any answers, please inform the All You Can Eat WHAT? Division at The Great Plotnik, Inc.

Speaking of the Plotzers, you may have to be a sports fan to appreciate this.

Yesterday, the Silent Bills came over for lunch, along with Plotnik's neighbor, Rob, who is a producer for Mythbusters and brought T-Shirts. Before the guests arrived, Plot was now and again checking the computer for the score of the Plotzer's day game with Florida.

So, lunch is quite tasty, and then everyone is sitting around talking, and Plot remembers that it was the bottom of the Ninth with the Plotzers ahead 5-3 when lunch began, and that was a few hours ago, so all he has to do is walk downstairs to glance at the monitor to see who won.

But he KNOWS that if he goes to check AT THIS MOMENT, with three Giant fans sitting on the deck, the Marlins will have risen up in the bottom of the Ninth, scored three runs and defeated the Plotzers. He also knows that if he waits until everyone has gone home, THEN he can check the score and the Plotzers will have won.

Mind you, the game has been over for three hours. The results are in. Plotnik KNOWS the results will not change if he checks now or if he checks later. He knows. But still.

He waits. The Silent Billniks FINALLY go home, GOD it takes FOREVER to get them to stop drinking more coffee and lazing around and then they have to hear Rob's story about the rattlesnake AGAIN and then MORE coffee and "Hey, what happened to that ice cream, I want some ice cream!" and then the mariachi band arrives with the jugglers, and then Rob comes back with his gorgeous daughter, and more talk, you know, and then a nap. Plotnik holds out until evening.

But when he checks: Plotzers won! TOLD ya!