Pigment Envy

Plotnik has given up trying to make his Dan Armstrong electric bass (above) stay in tune. He has accepted John the King's generous offer of a temporary loan of John's bass (below) instead. As anyone can see, John the King has a Man's bass. It reeks Metal Band. The Great Plotnik's bass, though cool looking, is clearly lacking in testosterone as well as proper pigment. And he should have coiled those string ends.

One can imagine real live bass players using John's bass on huge stages in front of adoring millions, whereas the only person Plotnik has ever seen play a Dan Armstrong bass is Dan Armstrong himself, a bunch of years ago, and also Plotnik in the Streisand/Elliot Gould movie, and Plot wasn't actually playing it, he was just pretending to play it.

Both basses are a ton of fun to play. In fact, there is no instrument that is more fun to play than electric bass. You get to feel it in your feet, and you also instantly recognize that without you there is no band. Guitar and piano players cream to play with a great bass player. Maybe in the next life Plotnik can return as an electric bassist, schooled in funk and jazz so nobody will ask him to play a polka, though to be perfectly honest Plot would rather come back as Wilson Pickett.