Guacapitty

Following yesterday's post about Guacapitty, we offer this recipe from The Great Plotnik Avocado Plantation:

GUACAPITTY

4 avocados from backyard tree.
1 hacksaw, sharp
1 sledgehammer, medium
Liver Loaf
Brussels Sprouts

Allow ample time for avocados to ripen. If they actually do, proceed to GUACAMOLE.

If they never ripen, place rock-hard avocado on concrete floor. With hacksaw, slowly slice through avocado, exposing pit. Set any avocado meat aside. It is inedible.

With sledgehammer, smash pit to smithereens. Watch out for toes, fingers and eyeballs.

Gather all avocado pit shards and inedible avocado meat into mixing bowl. Add 1/2 pound liver loaf and hundreds, no, thousands of brussels sprouts.

Serves 0.