Two Methods for Telemarketers

The Duck is onto something.

Ring. Ring. Ring.

"Hello?"

"May I speak with uh Missus Barbara uh Plotnookly? Plontookee?"

"She does not live here anymore."

"Do you have a forwarding..."

"Just cleared out in the middle of the night, by God. Never paid her rent."

"Uh..."

"Total loser that Mrs. Plotnookly. If you find her, let me know."

Click.

This is probably better than the way Plotnik handles it.

Ring Ring Ring

"May I speak with uh..."

(paraphrasing): "(Have Sex) you! (Have Sex) ALL you people! (Make puckering noise with lips) my (hindquarters)! You (wet, slimy detritus found on the bottom of ponds) suckers are (Having sex) up the whole (diety)(condemned) world!"

CLICK!
SLAM!
WHAMMO!